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Saturday, December 11, 2004

Multiple-Choice Hell

Never ever again will I minimize the implications of a multiple choice test.

Never ever ever ever, never ever again.

Of course I studied. We all studied. I just don't think we knew what we were studying for.

Typical comments from my classmates:

"I hated the last 5 hours of my life . . . I absolutely got my tail handed to me."

"That has to be the absolute worst test I have ever in my life taken."

"I'm actually looking forward to the torts exam, after this one."

People, you cannot know how deep into the darkest realm of humanity we were taken. We came face to face with absolute despair, humiliation, hopelessness. We found oursleves staring into the eyes of that "Dark Brooding Omnipresence of the Law". . . and we blinked.

O, the horror. The horror.

Defeated by legal hypotheticals people by the cast of the Flintstones (Slade had rocks dumped on his head by Flintstone at the quarry and brought suit alleging negligence but Pebbles was the rightful party instead) and Disney (Mickey was suing "the Club" for poisoning Pluto with Donald acting as defense counsel while Goofy had fled the country to take a job in France) and otherwise peppered with names like "Per" and "Pia" and "John E. B. Goode" and Massachusetts' Leprechauns looking to give away pots o' gold by using the Federal court system-- we began to feel as if taking the Law School Admissions Test had been a party in comparison.

Never again will I minimize the implications of taking a multiple-choice test.

Rumor has it, however, that this was Prof. CivPro's own form of inspired retribution. You see, the practice test we took was nothing at all like the hell we found yesterday.

The practice test was actually quite entertaining.

In the aftermath of that little exercise, however, a question arose as to an answer. An e-mail was sent to Prof. CivPro and he responded to all of us.

One extremely intelligent and oh-so-thoughtful classmate of mine, however, decided to then write an e-mail to a friend which was also accidentally sent to Prof. CivPro.

Prof. CivPro sent the following out to the rest of us:

"Here is a slightly-edited response that I received after my last

'so what? Did they (just by knowing about the lawsuit going
on) have actual notice or not? I wish this jack*** would just answer the f***ing
question in simple, easy to understand terms.'

And by the way . . . anonymous grading is a wonderful thing."

Thus began the rumors that Prof. CivPro was going to increase the difficulty of the final. Where he wasn't able to exact justice upon the idiot that sent the e-mail, he punished us all.

The only thing is: I don't really blame him.

Never again will I minimize the implications of taking a multiple-choice test.

Never ever ever again.


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