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Monday, October 25, 2004

"Swingers" (Law School version)

I borrowed the following from a student at UT Law. What he has to say is usually pretty freakin' hilarious, especially if you are a law student. So check it out at http://wingsandvodka.blogs.com/

Now, for those of you who know the movie Swingers with Jon Favreau and Vince Vaughn, this adaptation may take you back (to completely find the humor, it also might help if you are in law school):

"Scene From a Firm Reception"

Mike approaches a group of friends, having just gotten an attorney’s business card. He's excited.Also, he looks devastatingly handsome in his suit.

ThreeL: See, man. It’s not that hard. It’s what they’re here for.

Mike: I know. I was just nervous. This is my first reception. She seemed interested, though.

Two L: So…litigation?

Mike: Nope. IP. (Everyone reacts favorably to this department.)

Mike: So, how long do I wait to call her secretary and try to set up an interview?

ThreeL: A week.

Mike: Next week?

ThreeL: No...

Other ThreeL: ... Next week, then a week.

ThreeL: ... Yeah.

Mike: So, two weeks?

ThreeL: Yeah. I guess you could call it that.

Other ThreeL: Definitely. Two weeks. That's the industry standard...

ThreeL: See, I used to wait two weeks. Now everyone waits two weeks. Three weeks is kinda
first-tier now, don't you think?

Other ThreeL: ... Yeah. But two's enough not to look anxious...

ThreeL: Yeah, but three weeks is kinda Order of the Coif--

Mike : --Why don't I just wait four weeks and tell her that I was cleaning out my Torts book and I found her card...

TwoL: ... then ask where you met her…

Mike: Yeah, I'll tell her I don't remember and then I'll ask what firm she works at. (pause) Then I'll ask if we shagged. How's that? Is that first-tier? Is that Order of the Coif?

ThreeL: Laugh all you want, but if you call too soon you can scare off a nice firm that’s ready to make an offer.

Other ThreeL: Don't listen to him. You call whenever it feels right to you.

Mike: How long did you guys wait to call your firms?

(Beat.)

ThreeL & Other ThreeL: Six weeks.

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