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Friday, March 31, 2006

MiM on E-B-ay


Now the Moonlighting in Misery Shot Glass Candles can be yours. Check it out exclusively on Ebay.

They are totally sweet. Really.

Even sweeter than a Pirate Ninja named Chris.

But don't take my word for it, ask Walking Tort from Camel Nose Under the Tent -- she bought a set to call her very own last week.

And she was so excited when she got them, her head nearly exploded. No -- no really, I promise.

Because -- well -- they are totally sweet.
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We Were Absent the Day They Taught That

Lessons Not Taught in Law School That Should Be #72: Sharing is Good, Sharing is Right, Sharing is the best way to prevent a Fight.

I know a guy -- we'll call The Fonz -- that works for a litigation services company.

(For those don't know what a litigation services company is -- for a hefty price they'll do copying, produce electronic courtroom presentations, organize, sort, and store evidence, or generally anything else a lawyer doesn't want to do personally).

So back in January, during the NFL playoffs, the Fonz's company started giving away nerf footballs to their law firm clients.

At one particular mid-sized firm, the Fonz knew of a secretary who was a single mother raising an 8-year-old boy. So, being the cool guy that he is (I mean, he is the Fonz), he took one of the footballs along when visiting the firm and gave it to this secretary for her son. Then left.

Not two hours had gone by before he received a cell phone call from the receptionist of the firm:

"Mr. Fonz, the football you brought for [Secretary] was a nice gesture, but it has caused a lot of trouble. In fact, [Secretary's boss] took the football for himself. And I've been asked to tell you not to bring anything else to give away at the office unless you can bring enough for everyone."

So the Fonz -- quite furious -- immediately went back to his office, grabbed 20 more footballs, and took them to the Firm. He gave another one to the Secretary and told her to hide it, and dropped the rest off with the receptionist.

He then called me and yelled: "You all belong in kindergarten! Every last one of you!!"

I believe it was Shakespeare that wrote:

"The first thing we do is kill all the Lawyers!"

Amen.
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Thursday, March 30, 2006

Hector, Where's the Row? (A Political Rant)


A Houston high school principal was ordered yesterday to remove a Mexican flag he'd hoisted up the school's flagpole as a show of support for his protesting students. He has complied, although grudgingly.

"It is appropriate to fly the flags of the United States and Texas over schools in the Houston Independent School District, since we are a public entity of the state," a spokesman for HISD was reported saying. "It would not be appropriate for the school district to advocate allegiance to a country other than the United States."

I think this has been taken too far . . .

When living and working in Houston, I had the opportunity to meet and befriend several Mexican immigrants. One man, to this day, I tout as being one of the most courageous and selfless men I have ever met.

Hector worked in an aerospace factory making between $12-15/hour. He was well known for his desire and ability to work massive amounts of overtime. In fact, it was not unknown for Hector to work 70-80 hours a week doing whatever was desired of him -- from the dirtiest job to the quality inspection of the product.

Hector was also a very friendly and soft-spoken man. A husband and father of 5 children, he was dedicated to giving them every ounce of opportunity America had to offer his family. His children had college funds, decent clothes, a computer, a good-sized house and a very loving mother and father.

Hector was born in the United States, thus guaranteeing his citizenship, but his parents and siblings were not. When he was young, his father and older brothers would migrate through California following the crops in order to make money for the family. Hector told me stories of how he and his mother would hop freight trains to go into Mexico to visit his family during the working season.

Eventually, Hector was given the opportunity to go to an American high school after his parents settled in Texas. He then went on to college and was well on his way to being the first in his family to obtain a college degree when his girlfriend became pregnant. He dropped out of school, married her, and they have built a wonderful family since.

To many, Hector is a problem. To me, he was a Godsend.

And while Hector was proud of his culture and his heritage, I never once heard him even allude to the thought he was a Mexican first . . . or even second.

He was an American, a Texan, just like me.

We could always benefit from more people like Hector, and if that requires an Amnesty program -- so be it.

Texans are quite proud of what Mexican culture has contributed to our unique state. Texas, as a political entity, was really born of an attempt by the Mexican government to attract Americans to settle in Texas alongside Mexican counterparts to build the area.

When the movement for Texas independence began, it was originally a joint effort of native Mexicans and white immigrants seeking recognition from the Mexican government of Texas as a separate Mexican state with its own state government.

Our culture is indisputably comprised of both Mexican and American counterparts.

But we are, and always have been, Texans first. We are Americans as a political reality and because, for nearly 150 years we have benefited from what opportunities being a part of the United States has given us.

I was raised and taught of the importance of America as the "great melting pot."

Our strength is derived from the many contributions all of the different cultures have contributed.

And, yes, Americans can be a bit ego-centric when abroad. But I have yet to see an American storm the French parliament in an attempt to replace the French flag with our own.

I am tired of watching this group benefit from all the opportunities America has to offer, without a willingness to really contribute back to what made America great.

At that Houston high school, the students are defiant and refuse to give up the fight.

"Some Reagan students said they will try to raise a Mexican flag again today. They said they want it to fly at least above the Texas flag on the pole."

Now here is something quintessentially Texan:

You try to take down my flag in lieu of yours while I am around, and you will only succeed over my dead body.

Posted by Picasa
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Wednesday, March 29, 2006

My Mouth is Writing a Check . . .

If I've said it once, I've said it twice. And I will not hesitate to say it again:

Law Students whine way too damned much. WAY too much. They need to hold seminars on when to keep our mouths shut. Like right now -- I should probably just shut up.

But I am not going to. On the contrary . . .

I am going to keep typing and may even get myself in trouble.

DrudgeReport has posted a link to a story about a University of Memphis law professor banning the use of laptops in her class.

Not really much of a story, right? Definitely undeserving of Drudge . . . I thought.

But the story isn't what the law professor did, it is what how the law students responded.

They collected a petition. And then filed a complaint with the American Bar Association.

Because the ABA cares, right??

Yeah, uh, not really.

So now they're threatening to transfer schools if not allowed to use their laptops.

A fellow student commented to me: "Right, because law schools all over the nation must be clamoring to take in these disaffected University of Memphis geniuses . . ."

Uh, sure. But I don't think that matters . . .

After a little research, we've come to find this professor teaches Civil Procedure, Advanced Civil Procedure, and Evidence.

I couldn't have made it through that class without the internet.

I don't care if it was to the new Liberty University School of Law,

if I had to face Advanced CivPro without a computer, I might transfer too.
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Hey, Want to Make a Run to Taco Bell With Me?

Let me tell you a short little story about race relations in Texas.

(And a short story of how uncomfortable it is when a strange naked old man strikes up a conversation in the showers).

Back in 2002 I was cleaning-up alone in the showers of a Bally's Gym in Houston, Texas, when -- you guessed it -- a strange naked old man walked in and chose the showerhead directly beside mine. After only about 30 seconds of silence, his voice woke up and echoed off the tile walls, slapping me in the face.

Naked Guy: I'm retiring next week.

Mr. Misery: [silence]

Naked Guy: I'm moving up to Kansas, where my daughter lives.

Mr. Misery: [more silence]

Naked Guy: You lived in Houston long?

Mr. Misery: (nodding, resigned to the fact he was actually speaking to me) A few years.

Naked Guy: There's not much left for us here anymore besides. You should get out soon yourself.

Mr. Misery: What? Why??

Naked Guy: Look around you. There's no more America left. This place is more like NEW Mexico anymore.

Mr. Misery: [More Silence] (thinking to myself, "No, dippy, that is the state to the WEST of us.")

Naked Guy: Well, no matter, if you are the last one out . . . make sure and bring the flag with you.

As if on cue, at that exact moment a very large hispanic guy joins us in the showers. Conveniently, Old Naked Guy has finished washing, grabs his towel, and leaves. Completely stunned, and worried that the newcomer to the showers had heard the conversation and might think I was a willing participant . . .

I stayed and washed my hair again. Oh, yeah, I'm sure that reassured him. Though I can't say he didn't start to worry about my motives for sticking around then . . .

The fact is, there are a lot of people very worried about illegal immigration and -- even more -- the failure of many of these immigrants to assimilate into American culture.

In my experience, I've never met a Mexican immigrant who wanted to bring the Mexican government with him. And I've never met a first or second generation immigrant choosing to "live in the lap of luxury" and just loooovin' those food stamps on taxpayer's dollars.

But that is just my experience.

Now, of course, if your entire experience consists of watching on television as thousands of teenagers chant:

"Long live Mexico!"

And attempt to run the Mexican flag up the Courthouse pole . . .

Then you might start to worry.

And that is completely understandable.
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Tuesday, March 28, 2006

All Hell Breaks Loose

I received the following e-mail from my mother earlier this afternoon. It's priceless.

Just got a call from [Brother Misery], he was at the Stockyards in Ft. Worth making some calls and he saw all these hispanic kids meeting there, just swarming all over, they were getting in cars and heading for downtown to protest (he got caught right in the middle of them, they were swerving in and out of traffic, he said.) So he finds a cop and asks him if he knows what's going on and the cop didn't, so [Brother Misery] was like, "Man, there are hundreds of Hispanic kids headed for downtown, you better get ready for them." So he gets downtown, a couple blocks from the courthouse and there are thousands of them, climbing all over everything, protesting, fighting among themselves. I'm on the phone with him and I can hear them screaming in the background and [Brother Misery] says, "Oh my God! They just pulled down the American flag and they're trying to put the Mexican flag up." He said it was crazy. As he was leaving, he said hundreds of police started showing up, and there were reporters running towards the crowd.

Viva la Revolucion!!

That's all I have to say on the matter. . .
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Monday, March 27, 2006

Public Service Announcement


Should you choose to gratify yourself in a public restroom—especially when that public restroom is located in a semi-private area frequented by a limited number of people—please take the time to thoroughly clean up after yourself. Or, at the very least, use a stall that can be easily avoided.

Wow—I could say more. But I’m not sure I should’ve said so much.

ADDENDUM: To whomever left Friday's surprise -- Seriously. Be more careful. I could've broken my neck. And don't think I wouldn't have been able to establish gross negligence easy.
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Thursday, March 23, 2006

Random Thoughts on Wills & Trusts

Friday brings a mid-term exam covering Wills and Intestate Succession.

Although I've been warned his tests are difficult, at this point I am extremely grateful I've taken this course with Prof. Wills&Trusts. Not only did he write the book -- well, all the books for the class including the E&E -- but he also recorded some review sessions and made them available in an audio format for download.

The only problem being . . . given Prof. Wills&Trusts style and rhythm of speaking, listening to the recordings is much like a bedtime story. I get too comfortable, begin to drift off, and then continually need to listen to it again. It took me 45 minutes to get through 18 minutes of audio.

"And this potential heir wanted an advancement,
And this potential heir wanted none,
And this potential heir wanted to be the sole beneficiary of a testament,
And this potential heir went 'we we we' all the way home."

Elle from LegallyBlonde helped somewhat last night by explaining a Will contest case she's working on right now. I was able to consider it in the context of Texas law, that helped.

But I still don't understand why some wealthy old man would honestly feel sufficiently threatened by his young girlfriend's threats enough to make her his wife. She's living on your sprawling estate, eating from your table, and dressing by your dime. It has been that way for years or more -- why change it months before you die, especially if you want to limit her role as a beneficiary by will.

Anna Nicole Smith, anyone?

I'd bet a majority of the Supreme Court enjoyed the oral arguments the day she came to D.C. I can just picture it . . .

Roberts: Clarence? Clarence?? Clarence?!?

Thomas: Chief?

Roberts: You are hanging over the bench. And drooling. Do you have a question for counsel?

Thomas: Uh, yes . . . Ms. Smith --

Roberts: A question for counsel, Mr. Justice.

Thomas: Okay, Counselor, if Ms. Smith were in my office and I was drinking a can of Coca-Cola, and I realized it had a hair on it . . .

The other Justices: Noooooo!

Okay, I realize its a lame thought. But it made me smile this morning. And that is what counts.


DISCLAIMER: Mary Wahne neither endorses the content of this blog, nor finds anything about it even mildy entertaining. That being said, Mary now owns Moonlighting in Misery and so just be thankful I have allowed him time to write this nonsense in between his picking up my dry cleaning and waiting on me hand-and-foot.
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Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Update on Tech's Dunce Blawger

The 1L student I used as an example of what not to do with your blawg,

And then chastised for her ridiculousness in handling the situation,

Has proven, once more, her inability to handle her problem . . .

All of those wonderfully helpful comments left on her ONLY post have been deleted, and she has chosen not to post since then.

Perhaps she has been spending her time applying to more reasonable law schools.

I mean this with all sincerity -- Good Luck!

DISCLAIMER: Mary Wahne neither endorses the content of this blog, nor finds anything about it even mildy entertaining. That being said, Mary now owns Moonlighting in Misery and so just be thankful I have allowed him time to write this nonsense in between his picking up my dry cleaning and waiting on me hand-and-foot.
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Monday, March 20, 2006

On the Dry Erase Board

On the third floor, which serves as the Law Review offices here at Tech Law, we have a white dry erase board . . .

On which you can sometimes find truth so inherently simple -- and yet so profound -- that it is likely to be passed without notice.

Today I find this:

Law Review = Time

Time = Money

Money to Some = Happiness

However

Happiness to Some = Time minus anything related to Law Review

I feel like the MIT professor who first discovered the completed equations on the board in Good Will Hunting. Amen.

DISCLAIMER: Walking Tort neither endorses the content of this blog, nor finds anything about it even mildy entertaining. That being said, Camel Nose Under the Tent now owns Moonlighting in Misery and so just be thankful I have allowed him time to write this nonsense in between his picking up my dry cleaning and waiting on me hand-and-foot.
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Friday, March 17, 2006

Chris the Pirate Ninja

I could not possibly have imagined just how thoroughly the subject of Ninjas v. Pirates had already been dealt with on the internet. In fact, it has led to some extremely heated and nasty debate at times.

My initial inclination was that Ninjas are totally sweeter because of their "skills." Y'know, like nunchuck skills, bowhunting skills, computer hacking skills . . . Because girls only want boyfriends who have great skills. And Ninjas have skills.

But Pirates have the beach. And boats. And alcohol -- lots of it. And gold. And Johnny Depp. And girls want those things too.

"Dave P" on one forum wrote:

Pirates by a long shot [they are] like nowaday rappers.

Always running with a crew
Always have lots of ladies (wenches) around
Tons of bling (treasure)
Dope rides (big ass boats)
exotic pets (parrots)
and way cooler slang than most people.

But then "LUDELVR" wrote in the same forum:

Man, I'm taking a training course on how to be a ninja, and yes, in the book I"m reading right now, it states in big black bold letters "Ninjas must be trained properly before they can flip out and kill everyone because if they're not, they will only kill half the city" It's right there!!!! So yah, unless they are not properly trained then you can only expect half the number of dead people!But....everyone always dies when a ninja flips out so logic would have that every ninja is well trained! :thumbsup: for the ninja!

And "buh_buh" wrote:

if a ninja can flip out and kill an entire city, what makes you think a ninja can't flip out and kill an entire ship full of pirates? We're talking a single ninja here. If there were 2 or maybe 3 . . .

So how can I choose between those two equally plausible arguments?

Simply, I can't. But then I discovered I don't have to . . .

Because there is one indisputable truth --

Regardless of which is sweeter -- Ninja or Pirate -- nothing is sweeter than a Pirate Ninja named Chris. Nothing.

No. Nothing.

So initially I was thinking neither MVaughan nor Walking Tort were right. Afterall, the hybrid trumps every argument, right?

But I didn't ask about a hybrid. And they were the only people awesome enough to vote on the question . . .

So they both win.

The first half of the week, this blog belongs to Walking Tort and the second half it belongs to the lovely Mary Wahne, given to her as a gift from MVaughan. So enjoy, ladies . . .

And enjoy your free t-shirts. Pictures of the shirts they have chosen will be posted below. You too can own one of these t-shirts yourself . . . you just need to visit the link to the Moonlighting in Misery "Official Stores" included on the right sidebar.

Good news -- I am also in the process of lowering my prices between $2-4.

And, finally, as promised . . .

DISCLAIMER: Walking Tort neither endorses the content of this blog, nor finds anything about it even mildy entertaining. That being said, Camel Nose Under the Tent now owns Moonlighting in Misery and so just be thankful I have allowed him time to write this nonsense in between his picking up my dry cleaning and waiting on me hand-and-foot.
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And Walking Tort chose this shirt. Posted by Picasa
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MVaughan chose this shirt in a grey short sleeve style. Posted by Picasa
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Thursday, March 09, 2006

Ninjas v. Pirates: The Great Debate

In a clear demonstration of the rampant ignorance of which I warned in my previous post, and because I will not be posting again until I return from San Antonio next Wednesday . . .

I am asking -- no begging -- you to share your insights in the first ever
Moonlighting in Misery Battle Royale.

The topic? Well, did you read the title to this post??

It is, of course, the age old great debate:

Which are totally sweeter: Ninjas or Pirates?

Check out the websites to which I've linked regarding each, and leave a comment telling me who should win and why.

And I will spend all of my spare time over the next few days while visiting the wife's grandparents to study this issue out and determine which of the two, in fact, are totally the sweetest.

The person who correctly predicts the outcome and gives what I believe to be the best reason for that outcome will win the participant's prize. What is the participant's prize?

For one week I will change the title of this blog from:

MOONLIGHTING IN MISERY: A 2L AT TEXAS TECH SCHOOL OF LAW PROVIDING YET MORE PROOF THAT LAW SCHOOL MAKES YOU BORING

to:

[Name of person/blog] IS THE COOLEST (PERSON/BLOG): IF YOU ARE LOOKING FOR MOONLIGHTING IN MISERY, WHY? (GO TO MY BLOG/LOOK FOR ME) INSTEAD AS HE ACTUALLY MAKES "DATE MOVIE" SEEM FUNNY IN COMPARISON.

Oh, and I will begin each post during that week with the following disclaimer:

"[Name of person/blog] neither endorses the content of this blog, nor finds anything about it even mildy entertaining. That being said, [Name of person/blog] now owns Moonlighting in Misery and so just be thankful I have allowed him time to write this nonsense in between his picking up my dry cleaning and waiting on me hand-and-foot."

And, if you are Elle from LegallyBlonde and you win . . . I'll even update your link on my blogroll. What do you think of that?

Oh, and I'll also throw in a FREE T-SHIRT of your choice from my store, which you can browse through by clicking my link to the side.

So, to recap:

1. Rename my blog after you for a week.
2. Disclaimer in favor of you.
3. Free t-shirt.

What could be more wonderful than that . . . oh, and seeing how you decide to vote on the issue at hand?

Nothing. That is what.

So participate. And have fun.
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It is called SARCASM, Ballsack

I of course, was writing my previous post regarding the Gallup Poll with tongue completely in cheek . . .

Having been a minister before coming to Law School . . .

OF COURSE it is sarcasm.

But, seriously . . .

You people have to take the time to read the comment "Ballsack" left to my last post. I am not entirely sure my head has stopped spinning yet.

Can anyone tell me what he is talking about?
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Darwin's Black Box

Asked in a recent Gallup Poll:

"Which of the following statements comes closest to your views on the origin and development of human beings."

12% - Man evolved from a single cell organism with God playing no part.

31% - Man evolved but the evolution was God-guided.

53% - God created man exactly how the Bible described it. [Give me back my rib.]

(I assume the remaining 4% were Scientologists that believe we were created by Aliens and dropped off thousands of years ago to harvest the Earth for the superior race.)

57% of Republicans believe God created man according to the Genesis account.

44% of Democrats do.

This naturally leads me to ask the follow-up question:

What in the world is wrong with Americans?? Weren't we paying attention to our high school biology teachers when they clearly explained that God cannot exist???

Or how about the university Historical Geology professor who said anyone that still believes in the Biblical account of Creation is an ignorant yay-hoo and should be locked away . . . oh, and that poor people on food stamps should be fed dog food because of its high nutritional value.

Wow . . .

How have we ever survived so long with such gross and rampant ignorance?
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Wednesday, March 08, 2006

The Adam Sandler Response

O, what a glorious day for the law when quotes from Adam Sandler movies make it into the opinions of Federal judges . . .

No, honestly, I am not being sarcastic. I love it. Truly.

Imagine being this judge's law clerk and being asked to watch Adam Sandler movies as research for drafting an opinion.

I look forward to the day Chief Justice Roberts will feel the intellectual freedom to quote Cartman from South Park --

"The argument of petitioner, according to the well-established precedent of this Court, is 'all a bunch of tree hugging hippie crap . . .' See Cartman, South Park Episode XX."

And if I can ever find my way onto the bench . . . episodes of The Family Guy will be studied in law schools a hundred years from now as pertains to the affect they will have had on American jurisprudence.

For instance, if you find that your property is not recognized on a particular map . . . you will have the right to secede and declare yourself a separate country, but you will not have the right to annex your neighbor's swimming pool. See, e.g., Family Guy, Season Two, "E Peterbus Unum."

There will even be elements developed to help determine when this is an acceptable practice.

And it will be "Freakin' Sweet."
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Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Brokeback MISERY

Okay, I get it already . . .

You can conceivably take any movie -- or show -- ever made and parody it by using the music and format of the Brokeback Mountain trailer.

Good. Nice. It may have even been slightly amusing the first time. . .

when it was called . . . Brokeback to the Future.

BUT ENOUGH ALREADY!!!

They really aren't funny enough for you to spend the hours it takes to put one together.

You are wasting your time,

my time,

and a lot of space on the internet.

Stop.
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Visions of Grandeur Danced in their Heads

There was a law professor who once warned against our over-extending ourselves. If anyone could speak from experience on this topic, I imagine it would be her.

But I believe the real question is: Why should we need this reminder?

Who else knowingly wakes up each morning, stretches and wipes the sleep out of their eyes, and then says to themselves:

Let’s see how much joy I can squeeze out of my life today!

And what did our parents do to us when we were potty-training to make us this way?

No law school graduate is a slacker. I know slackers. They’re 28 years old and still living with their parents in Lawton, Oklahoma.

So go do something you enjoy, and not something you have to.
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Monday, March 06, 2006

I Have Done a Bad, Bad Thing

Through a friend I discovered Games.com.

And I registered.

And in 4 days I've played 21 games of Monopoly and 3 games of Scrabble.

Oh, and I got Elle from LegallyBlonde hooked, as well.

This is a bad, bad thing. And it doesn't look good for me getting that diploma now, Mom.

But maybe Elle can be saved, since I don't think I'll play with her anymore.

She is vicious. And never lets me win. I hope I never find myself arguing against her in court.

UPDATE: If anyone wants to play me, I'll be in the Monopoly "Short Games" lobby under the name "MrMisery."
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Friday, March 03, 2006

Good News!!

The 1L I posted about who was outed by e-mail yesterday, but then deleted her blog . . .

She has reappeared here. And she begins with a sort of half-explanation/half-apology to the student body.

She would definitely never make it working spin control in politics . . .

First off, you don't delete your old blog and create a new one using the same name just inviting constant surveillance of whatever you utter from here on out . . .

You do selectively delete posts on your old blog that will get you in trouble and/or offend the people you are trying not to offend.

THEN you write and post a letter on your old blog apologizing for the situation and explaining that when taken in the context of the blog you honestly meant no harm to anyone. And allow curious gawkers to course through the still-present entries, decide they are harmless, and will decide the controversy is not worth any more of their time.

And when you've done that, create a new blog anonymously and don't tell everyone where it is. Then you can tell your undergrad friends all over the nation where the new blog is and continue to criticize a vague and unidentifiable law student body.

This is much easier. After all, we are law students -- we recognize law students have problems. But only the law students at other schools.
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Wow, I Feel Much Safer Now

Back last June I posted about an obnoxiously obvious drug deal I watched at the Sonic next door to my duplex. It never occurred to me that, according to state law, this was an even worse crime given that there is a high school just across the street.

Last week Lubbock and federal authorities busted up "one of the largest crack cocaine operations in Lubbock." With the more than a dozen cars confiscated, the several houses raided, the hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of drugs hauled away, and the between 20 and 33 suspects arrested . . . how is this only one of the largest in Lubbock?

It isn't even one of the largest in all of West Texas. No? Just Lubbock? Meaning there are others . . . and some bigger?

If this was my hometown of Lawton, Oklahoma, I could believe it. But that is only because the larger operations are run by the cops and lawyers and judges, themselves -- so that goes without saying.

But yesterday I returned home to discover a duplex a couple houses down from mine was being raided for drugs. They arrested 3 and found X and meth labs. They are facing some stiff penalties because the duplex is within 1000 ft of a school zone.

But, honestly, what makes me feel better has nothing to do with the drug operations. These guys also appeared to be trafficking in stolen goods.

Holy Crap! Thank God they never peeked in my garage. Power tools are worth a lot at resale. (Other than my computer, attempting to steal my electronics would probably be a waste of their time.)

I knew there was a reason to keep my gun. But, shhhhh, I'm within 1000 ft of a school zone so I may not be allowed to have it.

I have two observations regarding the idiocy of criminals:

1. If you are going to run a meth lab, RENT A TRAILER not a duplex. These walls are not that thick, you were in a duplex, moron.

2. If you are going to run a meth lab, RENT A TRAILER IN THE COUNTRY. Thanks to your stupidity -- because you were so close to the school -- you are looking at an extended vacation as some big man's girlfriend.

Ha ha, even as I am writing this post . . . the noon news is opening with this story.

Best quote:

"As you can see, this was a duplex and the front door to the other duplex is just a few feet away. The Tech students living next door say there are surprised about how something like this could have gone on so close without their knowledge."

They were producing meth and x, living in an old duplex, and driving a Saleen. Do you really believe that?

Links to the Stories:

Three Arrested in Drug Bust Near Lubbock School

Narcotics, Firearms Seized in Drug Bust

Oh, and by the way, the duplex next to mine just went vacant after the tenant had a stroke. Any one need a place to live??
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Plausible Deniability

Look at the vast majority of popular bLAWgs, and you will find plausable deniability.

There is no reason not to attempt to maintain some degree of anonymity with a blawg.

Any thought posted here, no matter how closely guarded I were to keep it, has the potential of finding its way on to the computer screens of any fellow student, professor, or current or future employer that gets wind. I've understood from the beginning, thanks to the advice of SotheBearSays, that I must beware.

Some (for lack of a better word) morons look at a blog as a secret diary, a conversation with oneself, that can be shared selectively with friends.

When it comes to a blawg and law school -- as I've pointed out before, you can never be too sure of who your friends may be.

I probably have a few people from Texas Tech Law read my blawg on a fairly regular basis. They do so obviously because they have nothing better to do. But if I began using this blawg as a soapbox and sounding board to begin insulting certain classmates and fellow students, I am positive the readership from Texas Tech would pick up fairly quickly.

And aside from my regular comments about the egos of law students, and our horribly empty competitive natures, I try to stay away from insults. I don't think most law students take those observations as insults.

Some may even wear their over-inflated ego as a badge of honor, though I speak of no one in particular. And I find it as entertaining as they themselves often do.

A fellow classmate recently e-mailed me to ask if I, [Mr. Misery], am the author of this blawg. I never replied. Because while I hope he continues to read it, and may turn others on to it . . .

I must maintain . . . plausible deniability.

If you think you may know who you are, then the person you e-mailed may -- or may not -- be sorry for not replying. And I may -- or may not -- be that person.

A classmate sent out an e-mail to the entire student body last night with two entries from a blawg written by a 1L here. In the two selected entries, this 1L referred to the rest of us as being of less than "high intellectual caliber" and referred to our school as less than "reasonable." She also seemed to indicate that in order to get on to Law Review, a person would need to resort to "shameful" tactics. Oh, and there was the obligatory post about how the other girls don't know how to dress and they need to take her advice.

By this morning, the blawg has been deleted. But the poor girl named the address of the blawg after herself, and the posts included in the e-mail have her referring to herself by a first name. So it is with only a 5 second search that I can find her.

This probably won't ruin her law school life. But if I were her, I'd take an extra long weekend.

And I must say, if that is how she feels about Law Review then perhaps I hope she decides against doing the "shameful" things I must've done to get here.
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Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Yet another great way to waste an hour of your life . . .

I watched a matinee of Date Movie on Sunday.

I am not sure if I have ever been tempted to get up and leave in the middle of a movie, but I was on Sunday.

I will be nice and say: That movie was a piece of crap.

But what puzzles me most is a theater full of people laughing at this crap. Between the guy beside me that would let out an annoying “daayuuuum” each time the asian girl in the baby-doll outfit would come on screen and the woman behind me who felt she had to explain the movie to her friend (“See, now they’re making fun of Jennifer Lopez”), I nearly went crazy.

It was as if when preparing to make this movie, they took the scripts of several different romantic comedies and shredded them and threw them in the air. They then picked up the pieces and taped them together—not for an instance considering plot or even any flow—and said, “Okay, we have a movie!”

And people laughed at this crap.

They must have been passing something before the previews started. It skipped me, what a shame.

Because . . .

You’d have to be high to find that movie even remotely funny.
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Wednesday Wants to Know: Alcoholic's Edition

Question 1
a). What's the best drink to aid you to make your mind an etch-a-sketch?

The worst I have ever been was a result of vodka-heavy screwdrivers

b). What will you sip/nurse/chug when you are in a social setting and you cannot appear to be a lush?

Pepsi. If you don't wish to appear a lush, why drink at all? I tried cherry vodka sours last fall during a law firm's OCI coctail but that did not work. As a result of the anxiety, I lost track of how many I'd had.

c). Some say you are being cultured, others say you are an alcoholic; when drinking alone, what is your poison of choice?

A sweet white wine.


Question 2
What has your drunk___ done to embarass the ____ out of yourself the most?

I was 19. After drinking the vodka-heavy screwdrivers, and downing a little over a liter of vodka in less than 45 minutes, I guess I became the focal point of the party. Slipping in and out of consciousness over a 2 hour period I ranted and raved, I ended up standing on the table reciting Shakespeare, and I finally devolved to complaining about my then-girlfriend who I'd just found was quickly becoming a meth addict before excusing myself to the back porch to get sick.

An hour later, when I heard one friend say she wanted to take me to the hospital if I didn't stop puking soon . . . I asked to be helped to bed and was practically carried by two girls to my room.

The next day afternoon I had to go to a set-strike "party" for the production of "Three Birds Alighting on a Field" we'd just finished running. Someone must have recorded me the night before and passed out a script of my rants . . . because everyone else could repeat back to me things I don't even remember having said.


Question 3
In your best Thomas Crown impression, what is the best way to debonairly buy a person you are attracted to a drink?

Honestly, I have never done this.
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